Mariko21
Unforgetable Moderator
 Din: Your Wildest Dreams
Inregistrat: acum 18 ani
Postari: 1275
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Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters, their creator does! (If I did own them, it'd be a weird show, anyway...)
Chapter I: Letters to the Easter Bunny
Dear friend,
This is the 7th time I’m writing to you (I’ve started ever since I’ve learned how to write). You know I’ve been good and I’ve been slashing youkais, so you WILL bring me a present. Now… I wish for Inuyasha to admit that he loves me! I know it’s selfish and that, unlike the other years, I’m not wishing for world peace… Demo, I deserve to be happy so you will do as I say (write). Right?
Love, Kagome
P.S. If you don’t, I’ll use my bow (and I’m very good at wielding it, ‘cause Kaede-sama gave me archery lessons so… BEWARE!)
Dear long-eared fellow,
What I wish for this year is… what I’ve always wanted: somebody to bear my children! Lady Sango would be nice sooo… please take her as your first option. If you don’t find her good enough, others will be accepted. And I would also like some new beads, as mine are quite old…
Doumo, Miroku
Hello…
I don’t know why I’m writing to you, anyway. Oh, wait! Maybe it’s because Kagome is pointing an arrow at me! Good, she got the allusion and left… Listen, even if my ears aren’t as obvious as yours, I know how you feel when you’re being used by everybody…
I’ll ask you for something, just like everybody else, of course! (Just because we’re sort of alike doesn’t mean I won’t take advantage of the situation and ask for a present!) You can bring me one out of two: either you make Kagome love me, either you bring Kikyo back to life. So, guess that’s it.
Inuyasha
P.S. Also, take the Kotodama no Nenju away. This thing is hurting me and falling face down hurts some… sensitive parts… And what good is a mate if you can’t…?
P.P.S. Don’t bring any candy to Shippo!
Dear Easter-Bunny,
It’s the first time I’m writing to you (I just found out about you from Kagome!). I wish for three things:
1. Kohaku would be safe and back to his own self;
2. Miroku would STOP GROPING ME and would want to marry me;
3. Inuyasha and Sesshomaru would stop fighting for once. All I need is an afternoon with Sess to do some shopping. He’s so great at picking clothes and colors! Please, oh, please: one afternoon and, afterwards, they can kill each other!
Love, Sango
Dear buddy,
You’re small and so am I… This means that your tummy has the same lusts as my tummy. I need sweets, chocolates, candy, pokey (especially pokey!) and everything else that hurts my teeth and me happy and perky!
And don’t listen to Inuyasha, ‘cause he’s a big BAKA! Oh-oh… He saw me, he’s coming…
Gotta go, Shippo
Dear Usagi,
All Rin want is bunny give Rin ribbons and bunny make Sesshomaru-sama love Rin. And Rin want Jaken be dead!
Love, Rin
Uhm…hello…
I must be really careful, so I’ve hid in the woods. You know, if anybody saw me writing to you, then all the power that kono, Sesshomaru-sama, have won’t be respected anymore… OK, seems safe here!
Sooo, I’d like some new eye-liner (mine is close to its end… , but I want it on black. I’d also like some transparent lip-gloss, some black hair-paint, black nail-polish, and black clothes. And, instead of that boa I’d like one of those spiky collars. Yeah, you got it: I want to adopt the rocker look! I want to reinvent myself and I was thinking that Molko looks nice… You know… Brian Molko… from Placebo?
Brrr, it’s starting to get windy, so…
See ya, Sesshomaru-sama
P.S. Can you make Kouga my mate and marry me and adopt my baby Rin? Pls!
Dear pitiful thing,
You’ll bring me some new clothes, to match my master’s… Don’t even dare to say no, for kono, Jaken-sama (Fluffy-sama would kill me if he heard me copying him… am powerful… And, if you kill me, my master would avenge my death… hopefully…
Jaken
P.S. Take the pest named Rin off my back!
Dear hare-korro,
You’d better make Kagome my woman for good and kill that Inu-korro! Also… I’d like some rocker clothes, too. (I thought it wouldn’t be so much trouble for you, since you’re still going to buy some for Sess... I know that because I was the wind he felt!)
Humph, Kouga
Dear Bunny,
You are my last hope… Let the wind blow again *sniff-sniff*, let me be free… Whaaaaah! Kill Naraku! Kill him, cut him to pieces and give him to me for breakfast! (With sesame seeds and soy sauce if you can bring any…
Oh, and make Sesshy fall in love with me. He has such a nice body… He must be working out all day ling… He can work out with me if you know what I mean…
Kagura, the Wind Sorceress
Worthless creature,
You embarrass the world by existing! I don’t know why I’m writing to you, ‘cause I’m very powerful and I can have everything… Except the one thing I desire… Sesshomaru! Kukuku…
He has great sense of fashion and great hair… He’s like another I! We’d be perfect! Kukuku… And he makes poisonous gas and I have shoki… We’re soul-mates!
Kukuku, Naraku
Bunny,
I wish for Inuyasha to love me and join me in hell. I want souls… Many souls… And Kagome must die.
Kikyo
Dear bunny,
All I wish for is Kagome! Kill that oh-so-mean boyfriend of hers (she always complains of him anyways!). And let her become my wife, ‘cause you know we’re meant to be! Remember: fall in love… kill!
Houjo-kun
Chapter II: Wish granted(?)
Later, the Bunny makes all of them appear in a room. Enter the Easter-Bunny (small, chubby, pink, fluffy and with big ears and big, sparkling, blue eyes).
Easter-Bunny: “Well, I’ve gathered you here, where you can’t fight. It’s a special room were all of you are usual ningen.”
Inuyasha: “No shit! My hair’s pitch black!”
Sesshomaru: “I always knew I looked good with dark hair!”
Naraku: “Screw you! You’ll pay!”
Easter-Bunny: “Ah-ah! If you’re mean to me, this room becomes your eternal prison.”
Everybody makes angelic faces.
Easter-Bunny: “That’s better! Now, one at a time… Houjo-kun, consider all this just a freaky dream. You’re first. So, Kagome must die and Inuyasha must fall in love with you… Done!”
Inuyasha: “Oh, my love! Your footsteps are my light… Don’t run I love you!”
Houjo: “Kagome… Baka usagi! He was supposed to die and she was supposed to love me!”
Easter-Bunny *checks some notes*: “Oh, yes! My biggie! Sooo… I can’t kill him or make her love you. Bye. You’ll get candy.”
Houjo disappears.
Easter-Bunny: “Next is… Kagura. Naraku dies. “
Naraku is dead.
Kagura: “Yay! And the other itsy-bitsy matter?”
Easter-Bunny: Sorry, can’t do that. See ya!”
She disappears.
Easter-Bunny: “Naraku’s dead so his letter doesn’t matter. Next is… Shippo. Here are your sweets, auf wiedersen!”
The kitsune disappears after squeaking a YAY!
Easter-Bunny: “Next… Rin. So, Jaken dies *Jaken dies* and this means he won’t be needing anything… Oh, and Rin? Sess already loves you.”
She disappears.
Everybody: “Oh, how sweet… He loves her!”
Sesshomaru: “Stop it, you’re making me blush…”
Easter-Bunny: “Miroku, you get Sango, and she gets you, sayonara!”
Houshi-sama disappears, after kissing Sango and screaming YOSH!
Easter-Bunny: “Sango, you get him, Kohaku safe, an afternoon with Sesshy and 1 000 000 $”
Sango: “What?”
Easter-Bunny: “Sorry, got carried away…”
Sesshomaru: “Oh, lovely! I love shopping, and, honey, after I’m done with you… You’ll be YUMMY!”
Sango: “Yosh!”
Easter-Bunny: “Adieu!”
She disappears.
Easter-Bunny: “Sesshy, here are your clothes, make-up and collar and…”
Sesshomaru: “And, and?”
Easter-Bunny: “And Kouga is there for you to take…”
Kouga: “Naniii? I want Kagome…”
Easter-Bunny: “You’ll never-ever-ever get her! And her are your clothes, too”
Kouga: “In that case… *looks at Sesshomaru who was making a pirouette in front of him* Hmmm… Well, he sort of looks like a girl, and after dyeing his hair, he’ll resemble Kagome, sooo…. He’ll do just fine! And our clothes match… I’m yours, Sesshy!”
Sesshomaru *takes Kouga by the hand*: “Come, my love.”
Kouga *under his breath*: “Gotta get used to it, gotta get used to it…”
Easter-Bunny: “Arrividerci!”
They disappear gracefully and elegantly in an evanescent way.
Easter-Bunny: “Kagome, you get Inuyasha”
Kagome: “Really?”
Inuyasha: “Kagome… You wished to have me?”
Kikyo: “Whoa, whoa! What do I get?”
Easter-Bunny: “I only deliver to LIVING people.”
Kikyo: “Whaaah… I want a present, too!”
Easter-Bunny *hands her a handkerchief and Kikyo blows her nose noisily, elephant-style *: “There, there… You were nice in your lifetime, so I’ll make an exception. Sooo, you get… a week at a 5 star hotel in Hellywood, the hottest place in hell!”
Kikyo: “Yosh! I’ve always wanted to go there! Yay! Yay!”
She disappears jumping up and down.
Easter-Bunny: “Inuyasha, sorry, but I had to give Shippo the candy…”
Inuyasha *smacks Easter-Bunny*: “Thanks for reminding me that!”
Easter-Bunny: “Anyway, you get Kagome”
Kagome: “Yay, can we leave?”
Easter-Bunny: “You can… But he’s got some corpses to burry and until he finishes this, he’ll stay here.”
Inuyasha: “Nani?”
Kagome: “Bye!”
Inuyasha: “Wait… What about the rosary? You big-eared malefic creature…”
Easter-Bunny: “I must have my revenge for the smack and anyway you have tones of hours of practice at digging graves… Oh, and the beads are staying!”
Inuyasha: “But my… I’m doomed!”
Easter-Bunny: “You can always adopt Shippo *Inuyasha’s jaw dropped* and… I forgot to tell you that I can control the Kotodama no Nenju”
Inuyasha *whispered, looking up, towards Heaven*: “Oh, joy… Help me, God!”
Easter-Bunny: “OSUWARI!”
Inuyasha: “Argh!”
Easter-Bunny: “Hope you have a happy Easter and … oh, yeah! I almost forgot! Osuwari!”
Inuyasha: “Bwagh!”
Easter-Bunny: “Ain’t I a stinker?”
THE END
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War isn't about who is right, it's about who is left...
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